Believers are called to think about how to help other believers live right. This not only applies to attending church, but also to being involved in a small group. Believers gather so that they can help one another and be accountable to one another.
I lift weights from time to time, and I've found that it is best to do it when I have a partner. A good partner will not let me skip certain things or slack off, but will force me to go ahead and take an extra set. When I get stuck, a good partner helps me finish what I am doing. In short, a good partner holds me accountable.
James 5:16 says, "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed." The word "faults" mean "side slips, transgressions, or sins." Notice that it does not say to confess your faults to your pastor. Your pastor is not the only one you are accountable to. There should be other believers in your life that you are accountable to.
If you're married then your accountability partner should be your spouse. If you are not married, there should be someone of the same gender who can come to you and ask, "How are you doing on this issue?" It should be someone that you will tell the truth to. You don't need to tell everyone your business, but you do need to be accountable to someone who can help you and provoke you to love and good works.
Unbelievers cannot be your hanging buddies. If they are, it will not be long before you are living in sin as they are. You also cannot keep company with those struggling with a sinful area, whether they are an unbeliever or a believer. You might say, "I can't cut that person off. He's family. She's an old college buddy." But you cannot minister to that person while you are slipping into the very same sin in which he or she is entrapped.
I used to have friends who gossiped about other people. I would be talking with them, and it was not long before they started talking about someone, and I would join in. I soon realized I could not spend my time sinning like that. I had to cut them off for their own good and mine.
You can't say that you can never be around unbelievers, because if that were the case, you would have to leave the planet. Unbelievers are not living right, but you cannot reach them with that attitude. You must operate in love. But keep in mind that you must maintain boundaries. God sets these boundaries because He wants His best for your life, and does not want you to go through things that you do not have to go through.
So, be accountable and watch the company you keep!
---Pastor Andre Butler
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